Teacher Article

Today's Schedule
Back to Blog Home

I’m Not a Very “Good Yogi”



I’m not a very ‘good yogi’.

(And here I use both ‘good’ and ‘yogi’ pretty damn liberally.)

For instance…

I’m a little too attached to worldly possessions – I’ve lost two pairs of Prada sunglasses in the last two months and their loss has effected me deeply. If you’ve seen them, for Gods’ sakes PLEASE return at least ONE of them…

I have a helluva temper, and though I only stopped punching holes in walls because I’m also phenomenally lazy (and patching them proved to be a pain the ass), I still lose my shit regularly.

My face wears a perpetual frown like Michael Scott’s or The Rock’s – the result of scowling too much.

“That’s just how my face looks.” I often say.

“Well it looks like you think I’m an ass.” People sometimes say.

I promise, it’s unconscious…well, maybe sub-conscious – you, might after all, also be being an ass at the same time I’m making that face.

I like about 3 people, my dog Gonzo, diving, and drinking beer and smoking weed. And nothing else…(say it in a Ron Swanson voice and it’ll be more endearing…also, why is it funny when he hates everyone but off-putting when I do?)

I eat too much (rarely vegetables)…I drink too much (mostly whiskey)…And workout too seldom (as in rarely).

I’m horny all the time…like all the time. Even if I meditate all the time.

That’s not entirely true (see I’m also a liar…but, so are you, if you’re being honest)…

This one time at Vipassana (read with an American Pie voice)…after like a hundred hours of meditation I disconnected from truth and lies and desire and meat pies…but that was from meditating all the time.

Took me about three days to turn back down that path.

“I’d rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints,” as William Joel once sung, “Cause the sinners are much more fun.”

Oh, if only the good would die young!

I spend most days trying to attain some measure of self-forgiveness, and until I get there I could give a shit about anybody else.

All told, I’m actually a pretty damn ‘bad yogi’…

Except for the fact that there’s no such thing as a ‘good yogi’, yogis.

There’s only hard working yogis…Each and every one of us doing our very damned best to make something great outta’ what we got.

Incidentally there’s also cheat on you yogis, try and steal your business ideas from you yogis, screw you over yogis, and every other damn kind of yogi you care to think of.

Even a Justin Kaliszewski Yogi…

But, hey that’s just how I’m feelin’ today…so before we go and do something drastic, check in with yourself (and maybe me) – next time we see the sun it’s likely to be totally different…

The other day I saw a fortune-teller…she told me to, “spend more time channeling as a writer”. I said, “get out of my head, witch!” Visit me at www.justinkaliszewski.com or come take my class at Outlaw Yoga Littleton – “Colorado’s BEST Yoga Studio”.

 

Leave a comment

If you're breathing & paying attention
you're doing YOGA

Outlaw Yoga Vinyasa Yoga Littleton Colorado

If you're also celebrating you're doing
OUTLAW YOGA

Six Pack Classes

Directions to the Studio

Free Week

Directions to the Studio

Drop-in

Directions to the Studio

One Month Unlimited

Directions to the Studio

Twelve Pack Classes

Directions to the Studio

Senior/Student/Local Drop-in

Directions to the Studio

Corporate Contact

interested in setting up your corporate membership?

submit your information here and we will contact you with further details.

Get In Touch

Got a question, comment, or booking opportunity?

Drop us a line and we'll get back to you ASAP

[contact-form-7 404 "Not Found"]

Yoga Today

First-time students get a free first week!

Full Schedule

Student Memberships

Directions to the Studio

Pause or Cancel Request

Going on vacation, moving out of town, or financial hardship?

We understand. First, check out our Pause Policy or Cancel Policy to learn more about how it works. Then, fill out the form below.

Would you like to pause or cancel your membership?

Please review the following Pause Policy Agreement before submitting your pause request.

I have read and accept the Pause Policy

Pause date

Resume date

Please review the following Cancellation Policy Agreement before submitting your pause request.

I have read and accept the Cancel Policy

(Press only once, may take a moment)

Pause Membership

As a member of Outlaw Yoga Littleton (OYL), you are welcome to pause your membership for up to three months once per calendar year. If you are traveling, experiencing an injury, or know you will not be able to get to the studio for a period of time, pausing your membership is a great option. Pause requests must be submitted at least two weeks prior to your billing cycle date.

Please note that Outlaw Yoga Littleton does not allow paused memberships to be cancelled. Your membership must be active for 30 days prior to cancellation.

Exceptions to this rule include:
pregnancy, medical reasons, or military leave.

In these instances, OYL will waive the two-week notification policy so long as the request is submitted prior to your automatic billing date. If your cancellation request falls within these categories, please email sufficient documentation (doctor’s note, copy of deployment orders, etc.) to support your request to carly@outlawyoga.com.

Return to the form to review and accept the Policy Agreement before submitting your cancellation request.

Cancel Membership

As a member of Outlaw Yoga Littleton (OYL), you can cancel your membership after three months of active membership. Cancellations require a 30-day notice prior to your billing date.

Outlaw Yoga Littleton will make exceptions for the following circumstances:
Pregnancy, medical reasons, military leave, and moving outside the Denver Metro Area.

In these instances, OYL will waive the 30-day cancellation policy if notified prior to the automatic billing date. If your cancellation request falls within these categories, please email sufficient documentation (doctor’s note, copy of deployment orders, etc.) to support your request to carly@outlawyoga.com.

Return to the form to review and accept the Policy Agreement before submitting your cancellation request.

Teacher Training Interest

INTERESTED IN TEACHER TRAINING?

keep yourself in the loop on upcoming trainings, send us a quick note and we'll keep you informed.

Weekend Intensives Info

INTERESTED IN A WEEKEND INTENSIVE?

keep yourself in the loop on upcoming intensives, send us a quick note and we'll keep you informed.

*Which intensive(s) are you interested in?

Outlaw-X Training

INTERESTED IN TEACHING OUTLAW-X?

keep yourself in the loop on the next outlaw-x teacher training! send us a quick note and we'll keep you informed.

Outlaw Memberships

Directions to the Studio